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Here comes the depression

An individual with Asperger’s Syndrome will most of the time suffer with number of mental health issues. One may wonder as if autism in itself wasn’t enough and now there are more things to take care of.

I for example have anxiety and depression. There are days when it becomes so severe that I find it hard to leave the home, do my daily chores, talk to my loved ones and be a functioning member of the family.

Some say it is in my head, some think I do it for attention, but all I do in this time is to crawl into myself and isolate myself. I try to kill the time, the feelings, the overwhelming thoughts with music, TV, games but they are so strong that even during these activities I know it very well that it is not gonna do anything and I am just trying to run away from things which need to be sorted at the earliest.

I have tried alcohol, weed, over the counter medicines but nothing helps. How could it help when its not something physical but something I am feeling.

Just like physical injuries are visible on the body, anxiety and depression do a similar kind of damage to your brain. If you look closely at anyone or observe them carefully you can see that damage.

I read it somewhere that there is something that is killing everyone in their own way, some smoke, some do drugs, some drink, while I overthink and over analyse things. Once I enter the zone I just can’t get out.

I am positive that this is what will kill me in the long run, this will definitely reduce my lifespan over the years.

Over the last few months I have been reading and talking about Autism and Asperger’s Syndrome. I have interacted with few people on the spectrum and I have learnt that those who were diagnosed as a kid did much better in life while those like me who got their diagnosis very late are suffering from additional mental health issues.

I wish schools and parents were a bit more considerate and would learn to identify early signs of autism. AIIMS Delhi have develop an app using DSM V to identify autism for teachers and parents, it will help one to identify the early signs and then the therapist or the psychiatrist will take over. Hope and wish people can identify it early and help design a safe and healthy future for their children.


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